


i don't know what to do without you (i don't know where to put my hands)

by mozartsounds



Category: Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: Kind of angsty, Other, mentions of past Tom & Star relationship, theres some fluff i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2017-07-30
Packaged: 2018-12-09 00:25:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11657796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mozartsounds/pseuds/mozartsounds
Summary: And in that moment when he sees her he knows he'll be ok, they'll both be ok.





	i don't know what to do without you (i don't know where to put my hands)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm happy with this bless but anyways this is the aftermath of Star's fight with Toffee and Tom come to see if she's ok.

When he sees her in all of her glory all he can do is cry and run to her.

When she used to love him he never knew where to put his hands when they hugged, but now he knows when he holds her tight against him, rubs her hands along her back in comfort. He cries into the golden strands that are her hair and she parallels his actions by holding him tight too. And fuck he's just so glad to see her and he doesn't care if her hair is sticking to his wet tear stained cheeks and she can hear him crying, he's always been so vulnerable around her even after all that happened. He's still glad she's alive and breathing, and he wishes he could stay forever in her arms like this, she always gave the best comfort hugs.

Yet they must depart when that insufferable human that is her companion ( _and something more he suspects_ ) coughs awkwardly, and of course she's the first to let go, cause Lord knows he wouldn't be the first. Yet he still gives a nod to said insufferable human, and is somewhat relived to see Marco alive and well too. He watches as a small smile plays on her lips, and he takes her hands in his, and squeezes them just to remind himself that she's here in the flesh, still alive and breathing.

"You don't know how happy I am to see you alive."

He cries out, holding her hands so tight as she giggles, but she knows that he can see past her fake front, he can see she's still broken. "Well, here I am, in the flesh." She stammers, and he just wants to hug her again, or to hold her face, to drag his fingers across her under eyes, and to kiss the eyelids of her sad eyes, to  just kiss her cheeks or forehead and just to comfort her in general. He wants to return the favor for the nights she was soft and held him in the past, he just wants to repay her for everything.

"You scared the hell out of me! Star I thought _you were dead_. My mom even alerted me about it! How do you think it felt for my mom to just barge into my room and say, 'Hey sweetheart remember that Star girl? I'm afraid she's dead love.' _That broke my heart_."

He watched as her smile turned to a frown, watched her as she let go of his hands and held his face in hers. He felt her fingers swipe against his cheeks and he knew she was wiping away tears, and he held onto her wrists because he just needed to touch her skin to know she was still real. "What did you do cheat death or something? Star you were dead weren't you? My mom never fails to know if someone died of importance especially." He whispered as tears fell, and even though they were on Mewni grounds and Marco was close to them with an observant eye, they both fell to their knees in ripped clothing, with hands shaking and with hearts breaking.

"I'm not sure what I did, I'm not sure where I went."

Her voice shakes, and she holds to his face more and he watches her tears mimick hers, falling fast and stinging the eyes. " _It was so dark Tom_ , Glossaryk was there and he said I wasn't dead but I think I was. It was scary-I still don't know how I'm alive." She rushes her words just like her rushing tears, and her hands have fallen to her lap, and she cries. She cries into the air and the tears spill out of her eyes fast, she knows and everyone knows she's always been the loud and ugly crier.

"I was close wasn't I? I was so reckless, I am so reckless! Mom's so right about me oh god,  _I could have died_. I did die kind of too, didn't I? I could've been dead and I would never see my friends again especially Marco and I would never see you and I would never say sorry and my parents would be so sad and _I would have messed up the royal line just like Eclipsa_ -"

And he cuts her off by holding her, and they sit on dirt and mud, in ripped dresses and ripped shirts, crying into each other _because they are young and they are broken._ He cries because she's a magical princess that he's hopelessly in love with, cries that she could have died and he doesn't know what he would've done because he doesn't know what to do without her. And she cries because she's the said magical princess from a serious line of strong queens, and she just killed the man that once killed her grandmother and she still feels weak, she's cheated death and could've lost everything she loved in a blink of an eye. They need this, it won't fix everything but he needs to hold her and she needs to hold him because they always were best at comforting each other, she always put a smile to his face and he always calmed her down. He misses her, and he hopes she misses him too.

_"I don't know what to do without you."_

He whispers after some silence, running hands through the beautiful knotted hair he cries in. "Me either." She responds back after a moment, and their tears haven't stopped but they're lesser now. "You know I still love you right? I always will, and I'm never going to let anything like that happen again to you. Even if you don't love me anymore I'll always find a way to protect you. Hell, I was even thinking of resurrecting you from the dead." He laughs bitterly, and he can feel her smile slightly on his neck. "I still love you goofball, maybe not that way I should, but I can't control my feelings Tom, just like how you can't for me. But I love you ok? I'm glad I'm worth resurrecting for because you're worth hopping dimensions and fighting monsters for." She holds onto him tighter and he smiles when the tears escape his eyes.

"We're going to be ok alright?"

He tells her, and she nods into him. "We're going to be alright. I'm going to be alright and Mewni's going to be alright." She repeats to herself, and they hold each other because Tom's right. They're going to be ok and everything's going to be ok soon, even if the salt is still in the wound and still burning because she's Star Butterfly, and everything that comes across her knows she's radiant and knows she'll be fine. Because she's the future queen of Mewni and she'll fix everything in time.


End file.
